"Don't say we didn't warn you!"

If you are interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the three Baudelaire youngsters. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire were intelligent children, and they were charming, and resourceful, and had pleasant facial features, but they were extremely unlucky, and most everything that happened to them was rife with misfortune, misery, and despair. I'm sorry to tell you this, but that is how the story goes.

      The Bad Beginning
      A Series of Unfortunate Events, Book the First
      --Lemony Snicket

So begins the first volume of the most successful (to my knowledge) children's book series since Harry Potter.

This Christmas ("Coming Too Soon!"), Jim Carrey ("Bad actor. Worse villain.") will star as the evil Count Olaf, Jude Law as the series narrator, and Meryl Streep as Aunt Josephine when the movie version is released.

The movie is apparently based on the first three books in the series: The Bad Beginning, The Reptile Room, and The Wide Window. I tracked down at least one trailer and it looked impressive: faithfully preserving the bleak atmosphere and the morbid, tongue-in-cheek humor of the series.

I personally cannot stand Jim Carrey in almost any incarnation, but I suspect he was a shoe-in for the role of Count Olaf. I hope Daniel Handler (writing as Lemony Snicket) approves, because as of Christmas, Jim Carrey's portrayal of Count Olaf will become indelibly preserved as the character we all imagine.

It is my sad duty to attend and report on the movie, but there is nothing preventing you from watching something more cheerful this holiday season, if that’s sort of thing that entertains you.