Imponderables

Kids ask the greatest questions. So for a while I recorded many of the stumpers posed by Kevin, Andrew, and Justin. Here are some of my favorites from when they were three-and-a-half to five-years-old:

Daddy, when you were a little boy who took care of us?
How does the pee-pee get inside us?
Is the sky hard?
How do our arms work?
How do birds get to sleep?
Does God have blood?

Daddy, when you were four, what did you look like?
Why do our eyes move when we can just turn our heads?
Does an octopus have eyebrows?
Does chicken pox come from chickens?
Is it hard taking care of three boys?
Does God have a temper?

Does Daddy get to do anything he wants?
How did our eyes get inside our heads?
If the police take you and put you in jail, do they give you food?
Does it snow in China?
Does Santa sleep during the day?
Can God hear me when I whisper?


Ok, ok, since there are always those who insist upon knowing, here's how I may or may not have replied:

Good question, who takes care of your children now?; Don't worry, it's not how you think; Nope, only hard to imagine; Like a crane...but completely different; By counting peeps; Ask your mother.

Pretty much like Kevin, or Justin, depending upon whom you ask; So we can cheat on tests; Only in cartoons; No, nuggets come from chickens; You bet, look at my gray, um, blondish hair; Hell yes, read the Old Testament.

Hell no, not anymore; Through meditation; Yes, but it tastes like mud; Yes, but not in hell; No, he can't afford to; Yes, that's called prayer.